


Train Documentary Demo: The Number Car

by Justa_Bagel



Series: Infinity Train: The Entity's Pawn [1]
Category: Infinity Train (Cartoon), Who Killed Markiplier? (Web Series)
Genre: Crossover, Documentary, Flashbacks (kind of), Gen, Infinity train book 1 and 2 spoilers, Prologue, The Tape car, This is way in the past so people like Tulip aren't mentioned, Who Killed Markiplier?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:15:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25988056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Justa_Bagel/pseuds/Justa_Bagel
Summary: One-One is making a documentary on how passengers are processed in the tape car, and everyone's *favorite* actor, Mark, is the star...even though he's unconscious. What One-One doesn't anticipate is a certain parasite that made it's way on the train with him.
Series: Infinity Train: The Entity's Pawn [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1886209
Kudos: 7





	Train Documentary Demo: The Number Car

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all! This was kind of supposed to be posted last week in celebration of the new Infinity train season but I got lazy. I'm holding off on posting the first chapter of the actual fic where Actor!Mark is actually on the train until the release of the next 3 episodes of season 3 come out this Thursday, but either way there will be no spoilers for that season since this fic takes place before book 1. 
> 
> !Kind of Important! In the next fic when Actor Mark actually gets to explore the train, it won't read kind of like a script like this one does. I wanted to keep this as true to the one-one documentaries as a crummy fanfiction can be, so that's why it's only dialogue and no real description of what characters are doing. Just in case this one bores you to death since it's basically only dialogue.

_***Bzzt*** _

“Train Documentary DEMO! Greetings to whoever may be watching this!”

“ **Which is p** **robably no one but me, and the cold void of space.”**

“I am your host, One- **one.** Your one and ONLY conductor on this wonderful train you may call home!”

“ **Or prison.”**

“Many passengers wonder why they are here, but few want to know how! Which is what I’ll be showing you today, how you arrive on this beautiful train of ours.”

“ **You have a high probability of getting brutally crushed by a giant wheel in the first hour here, so it doesn’t really matter either way...”  
**

“So let’s get through with this documentary before that might happen.”

_***Bzzt*** _

“We start here, in the tape car. This car is very special- not only because the universe is projected on the outside- but also because this is where your journey on the train begins!”

“ **Technically your journey begins when we take you away from everything you ever knew.”  
**

“...To bring you here! The passenger docking bay- and the first part of our magical-

“ **-Algorithmic.”  
**

“-Magically algorithmic tour! Here in the docking bay is where we keep passengers before they get process.”

“ **Until then we line you up here on the wall, almost like a corpse storage.”**

“Or the world’s largest sleepover!”

“ **Of death.”**

“To make things simpler from here on out, we’ll be picking one of _you_ lucky passengers to be documented throughout processing.”

“ **You all have the same boring stories of woe anyways, shouldn’t be too hard.”**

“So many passengers in processing, it’s hard to choose only one.”

“ **I’ll never make up my mind, this is why nobody takes me seriously…”**

_***Bzzt** _

“hmm, no...”

_***Bzzt*** _

“ **How about them? They look murderous.”**

“Not them either, I’m not feeling that special spark. You know? The one that screams: _This is the one_!

“ **Once again, our pickiness stops us from moving forward in life.”**

_***Bzzt*** _

“ **...How about this passenger? Looks like they have a lot of pent up negative feelings that need to be-”**

“Ahhh!”

“ **See? I told you that passenger from earlier looked scarily murderous.”**

“No, look at that passenger-ahh!”

“Look at that outfit! Dressed to impress I see!”

“ **There’s stains of various fluids on it.”  
**

“-And more importantly, it’s red! Fun facts about the color red! It’s associated with many amazing things. Apple pie, the color red, pizza sauce...”

**“Blood, blood but this time out of your nose, blood but now it’s dripping onto the floor because you didn’t clean it up from your nose...”**

“There is no doubt in my mind that _this_ is the passenger for the documentary! Let’s check his name...”

******“I’m guessing his name is ‘entit** **y** **of unknown qualities’ …never mind my ideas are stupid.”**

“Looks like his name is...Mark, last name...e-pliers? Hehe that’s a funny name!”

“ **It’s ‘iplier’ you uncultured swine...robot? Ohmygosh what are we** _ **really**_ **?”**

_***Bzzt*** _

“Welcome to the next part of our tour, the passenger farm!”

“ **Corpse storage part 2, but now we’re digging around in your head.”  
**

“This is where the train scans your memories with little versions of myself, aren’t they cute?”

“ **Don’t worry, we make sure they don’t accidentally fall into your skull...** ** _most of the time._ ”**

“These little me’s root inside your head to pick up memories that may be helpful in deciding your number. Then, a porter comes and turns the film into a memory tape, they’re unique to every passenger.”

**“Just...don’t watch your own, some people just can’t get over the past...”**

“I hope ‘Mark’ has an interesting tape-for the sake of the documentary.”

“ **It has a high chance of being disappointing.”**

“-Disappointingly amazing! To the memory watching machine!”

_***Bzzt*** _ ****

“I’m very proud to announce that the new release of Mark’s maybe awesome story is out!”

“ **Don’t get too excited, the production quality is probably garbage.”  
**

“mmm-No more waiting! Let’s watch now.”

_**> >>** _

“ _-And I’ll be the hero, how does that sound?”_

“ _Ugh, but you’re always the hero, Mark!”_

“ _Well..who else would I be? You’re the sorceress, Damien’s the prince in danger, and Will’s the trustworthy loyal sidekick.”_

“ _-_ _Who has a gun! Right Mark?”  
_

“ _Yes, who has a gun. I for one think it’s perfectly fine, Celine.”_

“ _Fine, whatever…but I’m choosing the lineup next time!”_

_**> >>** _

“ _Acting school on the coast? Ha! They must’ve never seen you at parties, hope you don’t damage too many things.”_

“ _Yea...good one Damien.”  
_

“ _Hey, are you alright…?”_

“ _...”_

“… _Look, I know it’s been hard that William hasn’t sent a letter back yet...but wherever he is right now, I’m sure he’d want you to go.”_

“ _It just feels...wrong Dames, leaving so far away not knowing if he’s ali- okay or not.”_

“ _I understand, it’s been concerning me too…but..this is William we’re speaking of, if anyone could survive, it would be him.”_

“ _You really think so?”_

“ _I know it, I’m sure he’d be just as happy for you as we are if he were here.”_

“ _I dunno, you might miss this beautiful face if I do leave...”_

_“Ha! I’d say good riddance! Heh, but seriously, we’re all here for you, just don’t forget about us in that_ _fancy school of yours, ‘Mr. Mark Barnum’.”_

_“How could I? You and Celine have been beating it in my head ever since I got the acceptance letter. It’d be a chore to forget!”_

_**> >>**_

“ _I know I said I’d be back by the holidays Celine, but filming ran…much longer than expected.”_

…

“ _Yes, I know this has happened once before- I’m still trying to get on the new directors good side.”_

…

“ _Aww, you know I’ll make it up to you, with only the best there is.”_

…

“ _Yes, yes, if I don’t, you’ll carve my heart out, I promise.”_

… _  
_

“ _Love you too...”_

_**> >>**_

“ _Why would you do this to me William?!”_

“ _Me?! I did nothing to you! You’re the one who left everything behind to rot for your own damned career!”_

_“Stop acting like a_ _**child** _ _William- this isn’t just some game here you..you can just take what you want and everything will be fine!”  
_

“ _Celine is not an object! She made this choice on her own.”  
_

“ _Bullshit!”  
_

“ _Oh yes, forgive me, I must have forgotten, our precious Mark ‘iplier’ can never be wrong can never do any wrong, can he?”  
_

“ _Even if she did...why did...why did you accept? I trusted you- both of you!”_

“ _Because you weren’t treating her right, you never treated any of us right after you became an actor. You don’t care about anyone! I doubt you ever did in the first place.”_

“ _Get out.”_

“ _What?”  
_ _“_ _Get out of my house.”_

_“_ _Oh, so now it’s only_ _**your** _ _house?”  
_

“ _ **GET OUT OF HERE ALREADY GODDAMMIT!**_ _I never want to see your face here ever again! You_ _’re...You’re_ _ **DEAD**_ _to_ _ **ME**_ _.”_

_**> >>**_

“Gasp! The drama! The betrayal...turns out his last name isn’t ‘e-pliers’ at all, what a twist!”

“ **Huh.** **”**

“So much suspense in the shocking _real_ name reveal alone! So much juicy math- I wonder what his number will be? Oh, it’s about to be assigned right now-let’s get a closer look”

“ **Um, was I the only one who noticed the ominous dark shadows engulfing everything on the last memory or-”**

_***AGHH!*** _

“Oh dear, a passenger has never made a sound like that before during processing.”

**“Ugh...Excuse me! Passenger processing isn’t supposed to hurt. Stooop screaming it’s annoying!”**

“Hmm, passengers usually don’t wake up unless there’s some kind of outside inter-”

_**...** _

“Gasp again! It’s a stowaway, quite a ghostly one in fact.”

“ **Entity of unknown qualities. I knew it.”**

“Were you with that passenger the whole time?! Must’ve been awful through the ol’ memory scanner.”

“ **None of the sensors even picked you up at all, pretty concerning when you think about it-”**

_**...** _

“ **Stop interrupting me with your ominous silence!”**

“Sorry entity of unknown qualities, but in any case, I’m afraid stowaways aren’t allowed on the train, can’t have you accidentally getting hurt after all. Aww, don’t silently give me that look, it’s been the policy since forever, we can’t change that.”

“ **We don’t want you here. Shoo.”**

_**...** _

“ **Ahh! Put me down!”**

“As much as you picking us up is fun, entity of unknown qualities, I think it’s time you get back to the-”

“ **I get motion sickness very easily-** **Steward!”**

_***BAM*** _

“ _STOWAWAYS ARE NOT WELCOME ON THE TRAIN."_

… _ **!?!**_

***CLANK***

“Wow! If I could feel that it would have really hurt!”

“ **Even though it tried to kill us I miss it already.”  
**

“I didn’t know that entities of unknown qualities could phase through train cars. I didn’t even have time to send them back home.”

**“** **Why do I have a feeling we just** **made the biggest** **mistake-”**

“-Oh no! The lens cap was on the camera the whole time we were filming!”

“ **I** **gnore what I said before. This is the biggest mistake of the day. We should just rename ourselves mistake already.”  
**

“Hmm, guess this documentary will have to be audio only-ooh! Like a radio!”

“ **You’ll only be able to see the dark void of nothingness accompanied by voices. I heard that’s what death is like-”**

_***Bzzt*** _

**Author's Note:**

> Just Some Answers to some things that might be confusing because I like rambling
> 
> Why does One-one have a modern video camera in the late 1920's? I like to think that while time still passes in the real world when you're on the train, the train and the cars themselves are timeless, since at any year you get on the train, you can find both futuristic cars and more old-timey cars either way. 
> 
> Why did the train make the house demon stop possessing/influencing Actor! Mark? I think if Actor!Mark and the house demon were together on the train, his number would be astronomically higher due to it's influence, he'd probably never get off.
> 
> Do I think Actor!Mark could be redeemed by magical train kidnapping after the events of WKM? Not really. Same reasons as above, even more so considering he already screwed over his friends so his number would be even higher to start off with.


End file.
